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I still remember how quick the night changes. After that text, we grew apart. Even more. We ignore each other, no more phone calls, no more homework buddy.
I hate you.
We grow apart to the point that we always pick up a fight during a class. We got scolded, my mom scolded you, but we never stopped.
"You guys are always fighting, I don't know what happened but please do it after the class, okay?" Our math teacher scolded us both in front of everyone that day. That was embarrassing, and a failure for a smarty-pants like you.
But guess what, it still happens, right? I remember you told me to just skip the class instead of picking fights with you. I remember how I told you that you're just a heartless dork.
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I still remember that one night before the year of us being the first grader almost ended, you called me.
"Hi."
"Hi."
That was so awkward.
"I'm so sorry. That was an insensitive joke."
"What?"
"Oh please stop pretending."
"I forgive you then." I said half-heartedly.
"No you haven't. I'm so sorry. I told my sister about how you acted at school, and she scolded me instead! She said I was so stupid and insensitive to throw that jokes to a friend. I'm so sorry."
"Oh wow you told your sister???? Thanks, now I'm famous."
Then a familiar voice appears.
"Actually I can hear this conversation. My brother is stupid and I'm genuinely apologize to you on his behalf."
"Oh hello, it's fine really. I don't really want to bring that up again, actually."
"Okay then, you two can make up right now and be good friends again, okay. I'm leaving."
Then your sister left.
"So... You really forgive me?"
"Sure. I'm sorry for the rude words too."
"No it's fine, I deserve it."
The phone call lasted for hours. I remember my mom scolded me for having a late night call that day. That was the best night, of course. But you've changed. We've changed. There's this bitterness that is left in me.
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I still remember one day, your wisdom tooth had fallen. I came late to school that day, I forgot why but that was my first late ever in my life.
When I went in to the classroom, you welcomed me with a really big smile and said,
"Look, my tooth fell off last night!"
I had butterflies in my stomach. Never knew your smile could be that sweet.
I guess I like you.
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I still remember how smart you are. I adore you for that. I Still adore you for that. You ended up having the greatest score among all of us. I don't remember how though, but as far as I remember, a bunch of girls like you.
One day, I confessed to my best friend that I like you. On a sunny afternoon, I was waiting for my after-class study with her,
"Uhm can I tell you something?"
"Why do you finally want to confess to me that you like him?"
She can read me.
"Uhh how did you know?"
"Ugh that's so obvious. But seriously, from 1-10, how are you gonna score your feelings for him?"
"Uhh maybe 2, I still like him just like."
"You're being honest with me, right?"
"Of course." Later did I know, I lied. To her and myself.
"Just act as usual then, you guys are friends anyway."
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I still remember days before we moved to second grade, you suddenly called me, we're still on holiday and there's no way you're planning another movie night.
"Hi, what's up?"
"How's your holiday?" That's a silly question, but I answer it anyway.
"Uh same boring day, yours?"
"Nothing great."
"Okay."
"Okay."
I hate this silence.
"Uh, I wanna tell you something before we go back to school."
My heart is thumping so fast and loud I could hear it through my ears.
"Uh okay??"