I Still

Anindita Putri T
Chapter #7

past - that way

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I still remember our second grade passed by so fast, I remember we’re just having our first fights in the first grade, how you took care of me when I’m sick. Remember how I told you that I’m so good at suppressing bad things and things that I think they’re not really remarkable for me? Well, I don’t remember what happened during the last months of our second grade, but I do remember I had a better life than before. Maybe because we’re getting close again, or maybe I’m just glad that I can talk with you again. 


I’m still with my boyfriend this time, but we’re not like we used to be, we grow apart. I assumed that we’re not in the same school, and he’s a high schooler, I mean he could find someone better there, just like how I had you. Things are not like how they used to be. We’re getting busier, since we’re in the last step as middle schoolers. 


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I still remember how you kind of helped me with all the tests and mock exams, with everything I don’t really understand, especially math. We’re arguing even more, but this is not that kind of argument we had in the first grade, I’m just not that type to study, and you’re still a dork. 

Things are not getting better with me and my boyfriend, because of the upcoming exam, I guess you knew but you pretend like you don’t.


I still remember one day I showed up at school with swollen eyes. I try to hide it by wearing glasses, something that I’ve never had before. Everyone notices but you know, I’m quite invisible to them, so they won’t bother to ask, but you do.

“What on earth is happening with your eyes? It’s puffier than Mrs. Puff from Spongebob!” 

“Nothing, I'm not in the mood right now.” I said and laid my head on the table as usual.

There’s a long silence between us there. You’re sitting next to me and doing nothing.

“Are you breaking up with that old guy?” you asked cautiously.

“I don’t want to talk about it.” I was holding my laugh for that ‘old guy’ but I need to stay in my character, and today is gloomy and sad.

“Oh, c’mon now, you had exams coming up and you chose to cry over a guy that barely dated you for 2 months?” 

“At least he never bad-mouthed me in front of everyone, though.”

I shouldn't have said this, but sorry I can’t forget it.

I can hear you blowing out a heavy sigh.

“I'll leave then.”

“Yeah you should leave just like how every cowards did.”

“No, we're not having this conversation right now.” and you left.

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I still remember that day went so long, I feel like it took forever. I can’t really focus on every class, you’re not coming to my class because of the endless studying and so on. Then my best friend brought something to me for lunch.

“What did you just say to your buddy this morning? Why are your eyes swollen? I told you to let the tears fall down and not wipe it out right?”

Of course, you’ll tell her.

“I was so mad, I accidentally burst out and let my anger out to him, okay. Don’t blame me, he's the one who keeps asking me.”

“Yeah, but he’s just curious, can you just answer him?”

“I don’t remember I shared my relationship with him so I owe him nothing, I guess.”

My best friend was quite shocked, but she knew me so she’s fine with it.

“You had your point here, and if I were you I'd probably told him the same.”

“See? I know what I’m doing.”

The bell rings, marking the end of our lunch time and starting our extra classes.



Our math teacher comes into the room, ready to make an announcement.

“I’ve noticed that some of you are so lack in my subject, it’s either you’re still not understand with my way of teaching, or you’re just too good in another subject, which is great, but since the exam is coming and you need to nail every subjects, I’ll paired you guys with someone who I think could guide you and probably will make your grades better. We'll be mixing up with the other class, I believe you guys know each other, so please be well with them too, okay?”


Then she escorted us to the hall, along with your class too. I caught a glimpse at you, and we met our gaze. 

Then the teacher continued, “I’ll show your names up here,” she pointed on the big screen, “and it will be in alphabetical order from both classes. So get ready to spot your name, okay?”

I was quite sure that she’ll be pairing me up with you, since she’s teasing us in the second grade. But no, I got your best friend, the one that I told you he’s quite cute in the first grade and we don’t talk to each other for a week and then make up over an ice cream.



He still looks the same, that tall figure with nice fair skin and quite long hair for a student.

“Hi there, hope we’re getting along ‘till the exam!” he said while shaking my hand.

“Nice to be paired with you since I know your math scores are amazing! Yoroshiku!” I was a big fan of Naruto so I knew a bit of basic Japanese, just bragging in front of him.

“Oh you know Japanese?” he asked, amused by it.

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